My little girl makes me proud...each day!

Yesterday (20 december 2011) was 'Photo with Santa' day at my office. The first time I am bringing my daughter to office and the first time she is seeing Santa. I was a little worried because Maay is famous for her shrieks and a little stupid I am, was thinking if it would embarrass me. Shame on me for thinking that actually, I realised that I could never ever be embarrased my by little girl. When we drove and reached the car park near office, she insisted she would walk and didnt let me carry her. I was confident that she is in her energetic mood and wouldnt be a crying baby. But she took me by suprise when I reached our 6 th floor, where the photo shoot was happening. She walked on her own, went near people, laughed, clapped her hands and was dancing with joy. I couldnt be a more proud mother. My colleagues were surprised and were telling me what a happy baby she is. I was so happy, so proud and so excited. Being a child who hardly meets anyone (having grand parents take care of her at home), she is quite social and charming. She is an attention seeker and she does something or the other cute to grab that attention. I cannot wait to put her in play school for atleast a day and see how well she enjoys it. Hmm, all is well, but she did get a bit scared seeing Santa and his beard for the first time and started to cry. Everywhere else, she was just great. I took her to my desk, showed her around to my colleagues and she went closer to them, herself and started smiling, giving them her bunny to show that she likes them, etc. etc. God, am I the usual my-daughter-is-the-best-in-the-world boasting mother or is she really too special ? I guess a bit of both, actually:)

First hurt while playing

Yesterday - 12/12/11 Maya has her first hurt while playing. She was running around in our hall and fell on her face while she was walking towards us. Her teeth struck against her lips and started bleeding a little. A very little I guess, but both me and Uday were shocked and it broke our hearts. May be we will get used to it in due course when she starts playing much more. A sweet sport that she is, she immediately became ok when we took her to the tap and she started playing with water. While I was pressing water very softly against her lips, hoping she wouldnt notice, I couldnt help but think how much more hurt parents get when children get hurt and how my mother would have felt when I was bleeding profusely during my epidural injection. That small wound of mayas stayed in my mind for a long time. I wish I can be as sportive as her and be what I would like to call, a cool mom! Let me see how it goes.

Dad

My dad is here with me to help me take care of Maya while I am at work. I never thought that it would be this helpful, he helps me entirely with maya - to bath her, feed her, play with her and also helps me with cooking. Its such a huge moral support that I never ever imagined it to be. Yesterday, we were just talking about how girls of teenage get harrased by boys. I too passed that age and was so scared that it is entirely my fault if someone follows me. Then my dad said, I never told you this, but when you were in 11th or 12th standard and used to go to school in your Sunny, there used to be a college boy who would follow you. I noticed it for a couple of days, then I let you pass, then blocked that guy and started hitting him near Tea shop. Everyone who only saw me as a calm, indian bank manager started wondering what has got into him and then I told them that I am generally a calm person, but when someone disturbs my girls, I wouldnt let them do it. Then the T shop owner scared that guy off saying if that girls Uncle(politician) comes to know, he would kill you. Just run away. I never told you this cuz you were always very scared and timid". That moment, I realised, no matter to whom I am special or not, I had always been a special little girl to my father. I looked so proudly at my husband, who always somehow thought that I might not have been that pampered as he used to be.

My dad actually cares so much about me, even now. Ever since I got married, somehow I always had been feeling too matured, always taking care and not being taken care of. I felt emotionally worn out because I couldnt see anyone caring about me as much as I care about them. In a long time now, i actually feel pampered and being treated special, to worry about my rest and relaxing. It does feel super great:)

Are facebook friends really friends?

I highly doubt it. According to me, facebook is a medium to keep in touch with people you know, and they neednt necessarily be friends. I have a list of about 90 friends and there are hardly a four or five people who really respond to my messages or comments. I do have a few people in my so called "FRIENDS" list, who would not even respond for personalized messages. My doubt is, if I am not so important or you dont value my time, why the hell did you respond to my friend request and in some cases, why did you even add me as your friend? It is seriously irritating me a lot. Why would people IGNORE others and still have them on their friends list?

In this time, I would like to recollect the memory of writing to Singer Chinmayee. I adore her and once I wrote a mail just to appreciate her and got a reply within a couple of days. Being the "immediate reply" kind of person I am, I thanked her for her email and looks like she was online that time and bang, she replied immediately. I dont mean to degrade my "FRIENDS", but honestly, I dont believe any of them are as busy as Chinmayee and if she could be so kind and responsive to someone she hardly knew, why wouldnt others have the same courtesy.

I am beginning to think that I hate the whole FACEBOOK stuff because of a few people:)

Maya squeaks with Joy.....

Recently I changed my job, in an unorthodox way from a Permanent Position to Contracting, just because it suits my lifestyle. I prefer to work and get paid for the number of hours I want to, rather than being forced in a permanent job. It also gave me a travel option of going in a bus because I didnt have to depend on the car alone. The past two days, I came home by bus. Our home is in the first floor and Maya who usually is in the hall by that time, was in our room, looking through the window. She squeaked with Joy and kept calling Amma at the sight of me. Initially I was so happy, but also couldnt believe that she would have identified me and then called out. When I got hidden by the tree while walking towards our home, she was frantic and started crying out for me. I still think of her as a new born, not really knowing anything and everything she does, is a wonder to me. She dances, tries to sing these days, says 'Nila, Nila' and when I say, sit down on the bed, I will sing you a song, she promptly sits down and looks up to my face. I am sure she will learn and do so much more in the coming future, but its going to be a greatest achievement for me, everytime she does something. I was thinking recently, after my college days, I have had happy moments and sad moments, but I dont remember laughing heartily once the responsibilities and burdens sank in me. But for a small mischief that Maya does, my heart lights up with joy and I cannot stop laughing. I remember this saying ,'God cannot be everywhere, so he gave us mothers'. Its so true, thinking of my mother. But again, I feel, God cannot be everywhere,so he gave us kids:)

My little girl is mobile:)

3rd May 2011- A sweetest incident happened in my life.
I usually go home after work and give bath to Maya in the evenings. Yesterday evening I left her playing with her grandparents in the hall and went to our room to get things ready for her bath. I was so busy taking her clothes, her bath oil, etc and my sweetie pie had crawled across from the hall (with her grandmom watching over her carefully), came into my room, was trying to get up holding the door and called me ' amma'. Its the sweetest shock I ever had in the recent past and I am lingering over that picture again and again in my eyes. She looked so anxious and happy to see me. Ofcourse, it lasted for a minute and she came inside the room to explore other things lying on the floor. But my happiness knew no bounds that minute.

Our special times are when I bathe her, she sometimes comes closer to me, hugs me and kisses and then goes back to holding the tap to play. She smiles throughout the bath and its a special mom and daughter time we have. Every single day I wake up, I long for that moment. When I leave from office everyday, I know I will see my daughter, play with her, no matter how much ever short or long that time is going to be and it gives me a purpose to live life. It makes me the happiest mom to realise that she is happy to see me when I go back home. Being a working mom is not easy, I am sure all mothers who are away from their kids at work will agree. But there are special moments like this, make our lives worthwhile.

Clap...Clap...Clap....

My little Angel has started clapping now. I cannot explain in words how beautiful it looks to see her little hands come together. It brings sheer joy that any amount of words cannot just describe this feeling. It started a week ago, we were traditionally clapping for everything she does. Finishing her meal, crawling towards the other side of the bed, etc, etc. She realised that this act brings so much joy and started doing it on her own. Initially she used to clap her fists together and very soon when mom showed her how to really clap, she started following dutifully. For the first day she learnt to clap, my sweet little baby was clapping in her sleep. I need the entire eyes in the world just to capture that moment. Then she started doing it whenever she is happy. From day before yesterday, she does it so much to seek attention or soothe us if we are upset. Yesterday when I was a bit loud asking her to come closer to me and not tumble across the bed, she came near me and started clapping till I started laughing. The other day, we were all engrossed in watching something in the TV and she started clapping just to attract us. What an attention seeker she already is:) We cannot be more proud of her. Me and Uday always have this argument and wish about how frequently we should take videos of her. I agree to the fact that we should capture as much as possible to relive these moments in the future. But at sometimes I feel that, some moments are so beautiful that you dont really need a video clip to remind you how great it was. My little sweetheart, clapping her hands, her teethless smile, her fastest crawling when she sees me in the other side of the bed standing, her dancing when she hears music(so much as jumping for now), the sweet noise she makes and seeing if I imitate her, she actually repeats it till I make a similar sound and laughs uncontrollably when I do (it makes uday call her kutty dinosaur actually, cant wait to tell her in the future :), her hugging, her kisses. The other day a friends baby had come and my daughter was all so possessive and was crying if I lifted that baby. Can possessiveness be so sweet? I was so happy that moment that my daughter loves me so much. I really dont think I can ever forget these moments. I dont really need a video to relive these memories and forget my hard times in life. Every time my daughter does something, I only remember Bharathiyars song - Ethanai Kodi Inbam Vaithai Iraiva - which means God, how much Joy have you kept in store for us? Its true. Just see a mom talk about her child and you will know that its so true.

Major Milestones of my little Angel

I am hoping to update it frequently ...

28th Dec 2010 - Maya pronounced the word "Amma" so clearly. Mom was bathing her and I think she felt a little hot or in some other way uncomfortable .. she shrieked out 'Amma'. Both me and Uday were in the hall and we couldnt believe she actually said it. Trying since then to make her say Amma, but no luck yet:) But that moment, felt like a bliss, truly

17th Jan 2011 - Maya was asleep when I went home from office. As soon as she woke up, she saw me and for a while she just kept staring at me. I think she couldnt quite actually believe it, because usually mom wakes her up and she is all ready waiting for me in the hall when I go home. Yesterday was special for her and she was so happy. I fed her mashed carrots and she was laughing and smiling so much that clearly expressed how happy my angel was to see me. Never in my whole life I have felt so important. I always assumed that even without me, every ones life will be almost the same. But since Maya was born, I realised how important I can be to my little girl. My life has a purpose and I hope I fulfill that with utmost sincerity and love.

10th Feb - We had our Angels Sacred tonsure and Ear piercing ceremony in Adelaide itself. We had not planned to visit India for atleast another 6 months and its tradition to have babies tonsure done either before their first year or after three years. Maya had lots of hair and I had a feeling that she was not putting on weight because of her hair. I dont know the logical reasoning behind it, but I was very restless with this and we had it on Feb 10th. Maya hadnt slept properly the night before and I was wondering if she would be more cranky because of that. We wanted her to rest properly before her big day, but she just wouldnt sleep well. Feb 10th morning, we went to the temple and we had a special pooja made for us. I was very thrilled because I dont recall doing such a thing for babies at our place. We just go to Tirupathi and be one of the thousands of people who come there. So I think I felt more happier for having it done here. The priest made me cut locks of her hair and mark her ears. The pooja went on very fine and we came back home, refreshed and went to the salon. They removed her hair using the machine and believe it or not, she was quiet throughout. When it was almost over, everyone cheered her so much that she got scared and started crying. She looked so so cute in her mottai and I had a feeling the whole day that as if we had been to Tirupathi. We safely took our angels hair and came back home. She was very glad to see Amma (she hadnt come to the salon because she was scared if Maya would cry so much), hopped on to her and she is all smiles. She rested a little and then evening, we had to go almost to the other end of the city to have her ears pierced. I was very worried about this part. Just the day before, I read some articles on the net and some beauticians commented that its very tough to do for the kids, they get infected, etc, etc. It drove me nuts. Finally when we went there, the beauticians over there, two sweet looking girls, made Maya sit on Udays lap. They were so proficient, they marked the spot, both the girls took their stapler kind of machines, playing with Maya and rhythamically said 1.2.3...and there you go! Maya hadnt realised till then because she was looking at those beautiful girls and then she cried as much as she would cry for her vaccinations. Uday was petrified by then and I took Maya and rushed outside. There were some kids playing in the play area and we stopped to look at them. And thats about it. My dearest maya is all fine , looking at those kids and got into her playful mood. That time I wished, God, how nice it would be if I am half brave as her. This little girl teaches me so much, everyday. Apart from giving me the only reason to live, she is a miracle that happened in our lives, a Gods send. We had given her panadol, so she finally fell asleep and then on, she is just fine, with her beautiful ear rings. I am waiting to put the ear rings that my mom got for her, might take a while. The next day, we had organized a dinner party for our friends. It was the first ever time, we had hosted for about 15 people. I was so thrilled, but also worried about the space we have at home. Uday and sankar organized that so well and finally, our friends starting turning up. Just by that time, Maya fell asleep and we thought that a short nap will help her to feel fresh. In a while Maya woke up and I should say that we were a bit worried as how she would react seeing so much people. To our pleasant surprise and pride, she was being such a nice little party girl. She went to everyone, played so nicely, was so active and was so happy when she was in our hands, our friends' or her walker. We were speechless and all our friends were happy seeing a little baby smiling and coooing at them. There ended her Tonsure and ear piercing saga. I know I will recall this day forever, for my babies bravery, her adaptability and mostly, how nice a little party girl she was!